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Snow Pants: Lyrics

Christmas ornaments.

S = sound file L = lyrics T = transcription

S L X 1. Let's Be Merry
(lyrics: reuben; music: reuben)
holiday spirit's in the air
the end is coming soon
tomorrow we will wake up dead and sing a merry tune
christmas cheer and fun and glee
death and pain and dread
i must take your life, my friend
and the sugarplums in your head
i will eat them one by one for i am a jolly man
christmas makes me happy
i am sad to say i'm gone in a strange and distant land
i shall return on christmas day and gnaw away your hand
i am forever hungry for the flesh of living men
hitching a ride on santa's sleigh i will return again

X L X 2. Peppermint Pie

X L X 3. Wreath for a Toilet Seat

X L X 4. Snowballs Ringing Through My Head

X L X 5. Howdy Santa
i dream of santa
he's coming for me today
he's giving me toys and candy
candy by the cubic meter, candy by the mile
candy by the millimeter, candy by the pile
oh santa, give me what i want
i want toys and candy, candy by the pot
toys by the candy, candy by the toys
toys toys and candy, candy candy and toys
i still dream of santa
he's coming for me today
in my dreams he's made out of candy
his head is made out of toys
his arms are made out of candy
his legs are made out of toys
his brains is made out of candy
his elbow is made out of toys
his foot is made out of candy

X L X 6. My Little Red Mittens

X L X 7. Frozen Winter Salad
(music: the piz; lyrics: robbie)
this is a test of the emergency elephant system
this is only an elephant
one day on the way to the store i fell off a cliff and i fell on the floor
so i got up and ran to the doctor
i said, "look at my knee, it's halfway off"
he said, "don't worry, i'll fix it right up"
and he taped a banana to my head
five days later the banana began to rot so i had to take it to the doctor again
got attacked by a herd of monkeys
there was banana on my head
banana on my head
banana on my head
banana on my head
there was banana on my head 
banana on my head
banana on my head
banana on my head
banana on my head
a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away there lived a little elf named jobey
jobey was approximately three feet high and had long pointy ears
unfortunately jobey only had one leg so he could only walk on his hands and knees
or should i say knee for that matter
none of the other elves liked jobey very much
so santa came along one day
and he wanted to make jobey one of his workers because that was the law
santa had to be an equal opportunity employer
so he had to hire the elf on and make toys for him
jobey didn't do it very good and he ended up in a corporate law firm cleaning the toilets of other peoples
upon taking classes of cleaning toilets jobey found a large pot of gold in one of them
he had to examine this very carefully
at first he thought it was made of chocolate and tried to eat all of them
jobey was not a very smart man for only he had one leg
one day while walking to work to clean toilets, jobey got into a freak accident and lost the other leg
he then became a skydiver on the planet neptune
although there wasn't much atmosphere to breathe, jobey was a happy man
for he had gotten a pot of gold and a decent job

X L X 8. Gerry the Gingerbread Man

X L X 9. Christmas is Here
la la laaa

X L X 10. Hey, You, Gimme a Present
hey, you, gimme a present
and wish me a merry christmas too
i'll be your holiday pal
and you can be my holiday pal
hey, you, gimme a present
and some nice new candy canes
i'll be your christmas friend
your best friend 'til the end of december
hey, you, gimme a present
wrapped in red and green paper
get into the spirit of giving
and give me presents right now
i know you can give me some presents
i know you can give me them now
my friendship you'll be winning
this could be the beginning of
hey, you, gimme a present
hey, you, gimme a present
right now

X L X 11. Holiday Fun

X L X 12. Jengle Bills

X L X 13. Reindeer Poop

X L X 14. Above the Mistletoe

X L X 15. Tinsel in Your Ear

S L X 16. Ooo Ooo Christmastime
(music: the piz; lyrics: robbie w/the piz)
(ooo ooo christmastime)
forks and spoons and yellow baboons
this christmas we should be cartoons
we could fall off cliffs and never die
eats lots of cookies and fly in the sky
trees and peas and falling on our knees
let's pray to santa and get infested with fleas
we could ride our dogs and call them hogs
bundle up nicely and run through the fog
let's open up gifts and put on midriffs
eat some canes and go insane
ooo ooo christmastime
(ooo ooo ooooo)
santa came to me in a dream
it made me want to scream
so i ran away